Sometimes the door to our 45th Street apartment building won’t open because there is someone sleeping on the other side using a morning newspaper as a pillow. As I wedge my bike through the door, signs of my “normal” day begin: passengers piling on the 44, regulars streaming from the coffee shop, and kids walking to school.
When my husband and I moved to Wallingford four years ago, I only saw evidence of homelessness when spotting the odd tent or two around I-5. Now I see the signs more visibly throughout our neighborhood far from freeway underpasses – sidewalk sleeping, tents on the Burke, panhandlers on busy intersection corners, barefoot travelers on 45th pushing wheeled carts.
Benches, alleys, bus stops, cars – all places other than a home with a roof are places appearing on the 2016 One Night Count, which revealed a 19 percent increase in women, men and children without shelter (4,505 in 2016 vs. 3,772 in 2015). And while much of that increase was in South King County, areas like Wallingford are impacted too.
My little family of two hasn’t faced imminent eviction but we have felt the sting of Seattle’s growth and rising rents, living in four apartments in four years because of rent increases. (One rent increase was more than 30 percent with our landlord quipping, “The Googles or Amazons will pay this so why shouldn’t I charge it?”). Data from the Journal of Urban Affairs shows that when the average rent increases by $100, homelessness can jump 15 percent in urban areas.
The face of homelessness isn’t just a man under a shopping cart outside an apartment building either. In my work with Mary’s Place, an organization empowering homeless women, children and families, I meet moms who don’t know where their next pack of diapers will come from or if they can sign up in time for laundry to wash their kids’ clothes for clean clothes to wear to school.
“What I see is more and more families losing their housing,” says Rev. Jan Bolerjack of Riverton Park Methodist in Tukwila and advocate of homelessness awareness in the Puget Sound.
I think back to my morning commute and the kids walking to school — what it could feel like to see these emerging signs through their eyes? What would it be like to grow up where sleeping under the stars was both a summer rite of ritual for some and residency for others? Where a tent could be a $500 accessory and for some a month’s paycheck?
The One Night Census reminds me that as more families sleep outside, the connection to our neighborhood and our families becomes more visible too. What would it be like to know a classmate who didn’t have a home?
I’m not a parent yet, but I am curious about how we talk to our kids about the contrasts around us as Seattle faces more changes. I connected with several organizations and local experts and here are some tips they shared for discussing the issue with your kids.
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Validate their observations. Kids are perceptive and often see and understand even before adults when things are off or unfair. It’s important to validate what kids see and not dismiss details shares Mike Buchman, communications director for Solid Ground based in Wallingford. In doing so, “Parents can support their kids in their own pace of discovering their positions of the world,” says Buchman.
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Make it age appropriate. The depth and level of detail you share will vary by age and developmental stage. For a younger child, sharing simple statements such as “There aren’t enough homes for everyone” or “Not everyone makes enough money” may be sufficient. An older child may be able to engage in a conversation about policy or work on a math exercise to show how paying bills can be difficult with limited income.
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Use stories. When Lisa Gustaveson, program manager for Seattle University’s School of Theology and Ministry’s Faith and Family Homelessness Project, talks to kids about homelessness, she uses stories. “These stories help the kids see the crisis as more than just the tent – they may be able to identify with the person through a relatable topic,” says Gustaveson. Gustaveson often uses pets as an example. “We talk about how hard it would be to leave your pet if your only choice was to go into a shelter that didn’t allow animals.”
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Turn questions into action. When kids engage about the issue of homelessness, look for opportunities to turn their questions into opportunity to participate in a solution.
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Activities for all ages:
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Host a drive for items such as rain gear, socks, toiletry items or backpacks. Organizations like Mary’s Place often have a wish list of items in greatest need.
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Make care packages that include bottle water, travel-sized toiletry items and snacks.
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Check with local shelters or churches such as University Presbyterian’s Rotating Shelter Ministry to serve a meal.
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Donate canned goods to a local food bank such as Family Works in Wallingford. Family Works also hosts a Supermarket Food Drive the third Saturday of every month at QFC on 45th in Wallingford.
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Connect kids to stories. From Erika sharing how hard it is to do homework in a car through StoryCorps, to film events such as American Refugees, and books, homelessness can seem less foreign if we introduce the story behind the person.
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Activities for older kids:
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Attend a city council meeting, public rally, or community advocacy event.
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Write letters or create a video for city and state officials about why homelessness impacts you.
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“Homelessness impacts the entire community in both negative and positive ways,” says Bolerjack. “Sometimes in finger pointing, stereotyping and blaming. But also positively by increasing awareness and seeking solutions. We can all be part of the solution when we go beyond stereotypes and blaming.”
It can start simply. Try hello or a smile. “They are fellow travelers,” says Buchman. “We can respond being human and acknowledge the humanity in others.”
Upcoming Family-Friendly Event to Help Talk to Kids About Homelessness
“American Refugees: A Film Forum”
View four animated short films about real families, homelessness and resilience.
Thursday, Oct. 27 – Union (415 Westlake N)
6-8:30 p.m.
FREE
Description:
View four animated short films about real families, homelessness and resilience.
Each film will lead us into an interactive discussion with local experts and each other, giving us an opportunity to identify ways we can build a more effective response to the crisis of homelessness in Seattle.
6:00 pm – reception, no-host bar
7:00 pm – film screening and discussion
8:30 pm – opportunity for extended dialogue and opportunities to get involved
The four American Refugees short animated films were produced through the Seattle University Film & Family Homelessness Project. The filmmakers, using imaginative and cutting-edge animation techniques, created four different films that tell the stories of the thousands of Washington families who are homeless or living in poverty.
This event is co-hosted by University Presbyterian Church , Union Church and Seattle University School of Theology and Ministry.
What a thoughtful and insightful post! Thanks Emily.
Thank you for this helpful and sensitive post!
What do we say to our kids when they say all the homeless they see are men and the occasional woman? My thought is to say that homeless families with children usually get space in homeless shelters but I don’t know if that’s the case. What is true is that the homeless people my son tells me he sees around Wallingford are men and the homeless kids he used to know in elementary school lived in shelters.
That’s a great observation and question Becky. Not every shelter provides a space for families to stay together. In fact, Seattle has very few opportunities for partnered families to stay in the same space, leaving dads on the street or in a separate space. Mary’s Place is probably the largest provider of space for partnered families. Three of their shelter programs, which make up ~325 of their total beds, allow partnered families to stay together. I think it’s important to remember though that even when in a shelter, this is not a permanent home. It’s a safer place, but it’s not permanent and kids in this situation are confronting hard realities at a young age. Also, if you get a chance, try checking out “Super Dads,” one of the films from this event, that focuses on homeless dads based on a real family’s experience. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f2F2yhbLNy4
Great post! Thank you, Emily. A few years ago, one of my early elementary-age grandchildren wanted to take in as many apparent homeless home as their residence could accommodate, in sleeping bags, bunk beds, whatever. By grade four, she was concerned about the many who did not have teeth as well as the increasing numbers of homeless visible on the streets. This summer (about to enter grade seven), she became quite disillusioned when her gift to one (just-purchased sandwiches and fruit) was thrown on the ground with the statement “I need money, not food.”) We are both saddened.