Really, the story here isn’t “Depraved couple tries to give away toddler on Craigslist”, it’s “person with sick sense of humor pulls one over on gullible Orting man”, and we wouldn’t even report it, except that the title of the offending post is “Free Toddler to a Good Home (Wallingford)“.
The SeattleCrime blog reports that Seattle’s Internet Crimes Against Children unit is investigating a Craigslist posting purporting to be from a Wallingford couple who, having tired of their four-year-old, are seeking to give it away on Craigslist to the author of the best 250-word essay. The post reads, in part:
Outside of [redacted]’s hygiene and ability to potentially eat us out of house and home, the wife and I just want our old lives back. We want to travel and see the world and the wife is talking about going to art school and pursuing her dream to be a bust sculptor for wealthy aristocrats. Who am I to stand in her way? More importantly, who is [redacted] to stand in her way (or MY way, for that matter)? Maybe I want to get my pilot’s license or take a seasonal job on a cruise ship, but how am I supposed to do that with this knee-high food processor/complaint factory following me around everywhere I go?
[…]The screening process the wife and I have devised should be simple enough. If you are interested, all we ask is that you send a head shot and a written proposal (250 words or less please, we don’t have all the time in the world to read emails) stating why you would be a fit parent for [redacted]. Bribes also help, but are not entirely necessary as we would rather see [redacted] go ASAP — his departure from our lives is reward enough!
If you are interested in this wonderful child, please submit your 250-words via the email link above. We can’t wait to hear from you!
Location: Wallingford.
Really, we’re ambivalent about giving airtime to such a puerile prank. And we’re certainly not going to take the bait from Jonah Spangenthal-Lee, the SeattleCrime’s author, who left the comment:
Thanks. It once again proves that Craigslist and Wallingford are the two worst things on the planet.
Jonah lives in Wallingford, doesn’t he? 😉
Jonah,
You are obviously an oblivious, complete fool. Please stay away from Wallingford. You are unwelcome.
Sure looks like a joke to me.
Well, clearly it’s someone’s lame attempt at satire. But more to the point, if you read the whole thing it’s quite a long piece of writing for a parent whose child is supposedly usurping all their time. Maybe [redacted] doesn’t even exist, and this Craigslist post is meant to satirize Wallingford parents.
Maybe the ad was posted by the couple whose kid wandered out of the house and into the street with Daddy’s pipe in her pocket. (Am I remembering that right?)
You know parents need to think before they have kids, they are not mere accessories… I know how hard it is to raise an ungrateful child…yada, yada, but: you cannot be self centered or selfish when you are a parent, in fact you usually come in dead last in the needs department. If this was indeed a lame attempt at satire, it is not funny, in fact it’s kind of twisted. That is my opinion, and I run a childcare in the neighborhood for whats’ worth. Most ofmy families have been great, but over 25 plus years in the field I have come across some real characters!
Wallingford used to be sleepy and now it is WALLINGFORD. Funky has evolved into precious, PC goes without saying; the writer appears to be a non-breeder who has had enough Wallingford-centric and has done a great job of pushing buttons we didn’t even know we had.
I’m a non-breeder & proud of it.
Generally, I enjoy family settings/neighborhoods, but every now & then I get fed up– like last weekend when some couple thought it was absolutely adorable that their 3 year old screamed at the top his lungs the entire time they were eating breakfast at Essential Baking. Have you noticed the acoustics in that place? WOW. Kids goes on to yell , “I HATE YOU” a few times, which they seemed to think was super cute & a little funny.
It takes a village, yes. But the village could use some leadership every now & then.
😉
I’m with Chris. I don’t need to hear your childs’ song that you thing is so precious.
also, what is with allowing the kids at the bar, Tangletown Pub?
Are we turning into Prospect Park? Breeders v. non?
I was born and raised in Wallingford. It is so sad to read these comments. Wallingford used to be a neighborhood of families, single or not, children or not, who really cared about each other, and also of people who understood satire and irony. Has it really come to that??? If so, then I am not proud to be a native.
Agree with the posts about parents who think that their children are adorable when they ruin everyone’s meal, but that happens everywhere now. To them I say either train them to behave in public or keep them at home. You have no right to let them disturb anyone, and no one is entertained by their antics. I have three sons. If any of them misbehaved in a restaurant, a store, etc. we LEFT!!! If they can’t learn to respect other people’s space then they belong at home. I have also said this to the offending parents. It is not the fault of the children. It is the parents who are to blame.
I’m assuming this Craigslist ad is a joke probably drafted after a long day with a young child. I don’t find it immoral or offensive or anything, but I also don’t think it’s that funny or clever. If it made him feel better to post it, fine.
As a relatively new parent who used to shoot daggers any time I heard someone else’s kids being obnoxious in public, I have to toss in my 2 cents. While I recognize there are places that are absolutely inappropriate to take kids, I disagree that the contours of that space is everywhere in public that other people might be (not that anyone here was saying that, but my family got daggers recently at Blue Star, so it’s been on my mind). It’s bound to happen that you’ll venture out somewhere not entirely inappropriate but populated w/ people who either don’t have kids or their kids are perfect, and your kids will start to act up — they’re kids, after all, and sometimes they have a hard time with the whole be-quiet-sit-still thing. I agree parents have a duty to teach their kids to behave (to a point: No one likes a little automaton, and they make the *worst* adults when they grow up), but sometimes the moral lesson on social grace turns into a worse problem than just letting something go. It’s a little unrealistic to expect people to stay in their houses until the kids are 10.
In no way did I suggest that people stay in their houses until the kids are 10. Take them anywhere if they know that screaming and kicking is not acceptable behavior in a place where other people have gone to have a relaxing meal. If they don’t know this then take them to “kid” restaurants and get a babysitter when you want to go somewhere nicer. We have had some absolute nightmare meals where parents pay absolutely no attention to a child who is screaming at the top of his lungs, kicking the table, and generally giving other diners indigestion. This is NOT acceptable.
I agree, native, and I didn’t mean to imply that anyone here said anything untoward. I just wanted to share another perspective, because it was a huge adjustment for me after having a baby to realize how unpredictable they can be. Thankfully we just found an awesome babysitter, so we’re looking forward to visiting some grown-up places again!
The posting was apparently meant as a satire of self-absorbed types who should not have children. I doubt it was the ruminations of a fed-up parent–no parent calls a four-year-old a toddler, for starters. More to the point–going to art school? Pilot’s license? The slightly exaggerated truths of satire.
It was satire, but not particularly clever or well-written. Not worth a lot of notice, except, as Sparky so very wisely puts it, it does push some uncomfortable Wallingford buttons.